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When Hope Takes a Vacation

When Hope Takes a Vacation

Upon return from our Walt Disney World trip, the scale really pissed me off was alarming. I would say my healthy eating has deteriorated to the point that I’m eating like a college frat house but with wine instead of beer. Yes, the whole house, not just one member.

Okay. That’s an exaggeration.  But it is how I perceive it. I had no inner drive to eat well, despite my tight clothes and closet full of cute clothes that I can’t wear at all without looking like the Michelin man. I wish I knew what comes over me at those times. Do I blame it on hormones? On money stresses from work being so slow? On wine and sugar tasting soooo goooood?

I don’t flip a switch when I make changes. It’s more of a slow ramping up, prepping myself mentally, until the day of reckoning that I start. I’m still struggling to picture myself as successful at being a healthy, physically strong woman. I so often tell myself I can’t, despite the changes I’ve wrought and physical accomplishments I’ve achieved.

I’ve gone from this:

Ironically this picture could be worse! Something about eating a giant spoon of tiramisu made a good angle for missing my other chin.

And now I’m more this:

And this: although I’m pretty sure it’s my friend the cocktail shaker that’s contributed to me not fitting into that dress anymore. This was in April, and I was out without my husband. I want to wear this dress out WITH him dangit.

So tomorrow’s a new day. Hope’s back from vacation. I’ve invited her to take up permanent residence. We’ll see if she flees when I’m facing sugar withdrawals as I try to eat healthier or if she bails when I’ve got crazy muscle soreness (well, that would be now since I’m hobbling around since yesterday’s race).  Hm, guess that means things are looking up!

(And, as soon as I can get more pictures, I’ll do a recap of yesterday’s crazy 10K at the Rose Bowl.)

Pour Some Sugar on Me!

Pour Some Sugar on Me!

I’m back from lovely, fabulous, fun Walt Disney World. My computer screen didn’t spontaneously heal itself, but I am going to choose to view it as half full instead of half empty. I miss my blog, so I’ll just manage.

I had dessert after dessert at “the World.” I’m focusing now on just a couple things and will do a bigger trip recap later. Here is one little morsel:

That’s Bailey’s Irish Cream and Whiskey mousse, our dessert from the Coral Reef restaurant at EPCOT. Here is a picture of one of our dining companions, this awesome turtle who spent almost the entire meal hanging out in this area.

What I did discover this trip is the more sugar I ate, the more I wanted. It was an interesting realization, and I took no action on it until now, at home. I gained a LOT of weight over the past week and a half, but I’ve also been spending a lot of time with me, myself, and I in my head talking about what’s holding me back. Of course, I did not plan on losing weight this trip–at all! So my plan for today is to eat the volume of food I want (ie no calorie restriction) but eat no processed sugar and make healthy choices.

This morning breakfast was my Coach’s oats with blueberries and Greek yogurt. Oh, how I missed this on my trip. Lunch was TLC crackers, laughing cow cheese, an apple followed by snack an hour later of pineapple Greek yogurt and cashews.

I know it looks like I’m in a cave or something. Whatever.

I love that Alan took this picture of me!I’m pretty much always asking people if they want me to take a picture of them together. Alan calls it my part-time job.

It was super hot and humid this time of year. I’ll never go back in September again. So we had to hydrate. A lot.

This is at Raglan Road, our favorite WDW restaurant. We have gone there every trip for the live music and Irish dancing. I even tricked Alan into going twice this trip by saying “hey, let’s go see what movies are playing” and then suggesting we bide our time with drinks at Raglan Road before the movie which subconsiously I had not intention of ever seeing.

I did get a lot of kisses this trip too.

And on this trip I realized I’m THAT GIRL. Know who “that girl” is? She’s the one who, despite eating like crazy and drinking even crazier, despite the air that feels like soup, despite her hubby not being the least bit interested, is going to go out and run anyway. I just HAD to get out and exercise, and I ended up going on two three-mile runs. My last one I finished off by doing a mile on the treadmill (ah, sweet air conditioning) with no walk breaks at a 10:00 pace. Yep, I’m that girl, and I’m on my way to becoming even more awesome.

You Can Even Put it in Salad!

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Yeah, that’s how the bacon commercial I keep hearing on the radio ends. A bacon commercial. No fair. Bacon doesn’t need a pusher. It’s fabulous all on its own, and I need no reminder to call it to mind several times a day. If they follow it with a peanut butter commercial, I’m done for.
I’ve been absent because I’m incredibly busy at the moment. And then this happened this weekend. Half my laptop screen is pretty vertical stripes which makes looking at bacon porn doing blog posts very difficult. So I’m doing this from my phone. It may suck. Not too sure.
I have big plans for the weekend, so don’t expect to hear from me til afterward. As a quick note, I am expanding my greek yogurt world.

What’s your favorite greek yogurt brand/flavor?

Goofy Race Recap*

I’m here to tell you all about the Disneyland Half I did on Sunday. Yay me! Or not-so-yay for you if you’re not interested!

When my friend Trish decided she wanted to do the Disneyland Half (DH) for her 40th birthday, I was thrilled to be able to join her for her first half marathon. I had done the DH in 2007 and 2008 but in general wasn’t very interested in it mostly because it’s so ridiculously expensive. Here we are Saturday morning before leaving home, kids, and husbands.

We drove to the Dland Hotel where the expo to shop pick up our race bibs and shirts was. The bib pickup was under the convention area, and the rug leading into it was designed like a track (so cute) with racing characters.

So I made asked Trish to pose with Goofy (her fave).  The great thing about Trish is she’s up for pretty much anything ridiculous, goofy, silly, etc. That made for costume planning early on in our training. I’d never dressed up for a race, and I was very enthusiastic about it.

Super-cute bibs, baby!

We wandered around shopping. My favorite booth was probably One More Mile. Here are my dream shirts since I don’t have an unlimited budget.

But I could afford this sticker.

We saw some MousePlanet.com people we know from MouseAdventure while we were at the expo, and I also got some flashing blinky light thingies to wear when I’m running at dawn. We sat in the expo and ate our Subway sandwiches we had bought on the way down. From there we went to our hotel for a while to relax and prep for the next day before our 5:30 dinner with our team. We were going to watch the new Pirates of the Carribean on pay per view, but it was $17.00. It did not come with a hot pirate stripper to our room and, therefore, wasn’t worth the moolah. So we watched Jane Eyre (which was on sale and had nobody hot in it at all).

Dinner was at Catal at Downtown Disney, where the chef had made a couple pre-run dishes. I had whole-wheat pasta with chicken meatballs and heirloom Towmaters (haha). The food was good but not amazing. However, the cocktail menu was blowing me away. I had to fold it over so I couldn’t see it. Lookie at this drink:

THE PALOMA*
Spanish for “dove”. 1800 Reposado tequila, agave nectar, fresh lime and grapefruit juices, club soda 12

*see above sticker

Thank goodness the company at dinner was so fabulous that I wasn’t crying in my water over missing tequila. After dinner was a little window shopping and back to the hotel where I spent the evening reading. (this book, which was really good: The 19th Wife http://www.amazon.com/19th-Wife-Novel-David-Ebershoff/dp/0812974158/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1315359554&sr=8-1

The alarm was set for 3:30, but I was awake at 3:10. In-room coffee is the key here. We dressed up got our running gear on and walked to the stage at the start area to meet with our Galloway running team. I won’t post pics of everyone since I don’t have permission, but our group had a Snow White, a beautiful pink fairy, and Tron (custom costume with light-up wire and everything). Trish and I were incredibles.

This would be way cuter if the bags of stuff weren’t at our feet. It was fun seeing costumes. I didn’t expect it, but people wanted to take pictures with us. I made them pay me a dollar said that was great! At 5:00 it was time to get into our corrals. We slowly made our way over with the crowds. Once in the corral, we met up with our neighbor Mike who got into the race at the last minute. He was jazzed to be Mr. (polygamous) Incredible. So our group was going to be six strong running the race together, doing a 2:1 run/walk interval. The national anthem was sung (tear time), and fireworks went off for the start of the race. We were in corral E and went over the start line around 25 minutes after the official start.We wove our way through the back of California Adventure. Here we are by Tower of Terror. I love this picture! I’m yelling thanking the CA Adventure employees cheering us on, and Trish is super cute.

The race ran through CA Adventure and then into Dland and up Main Street. It went all over the park and through backstage areas–a lot of them! There were characters and floats to take pictures with which was our original plan. But the lines were, like, 20 people long. It was either take pictures and break off from our group and have the race take 3:30 or stay with our group and not take pictures. No pictures for us.  But if The Incredibles had been out there, that would have been a different story!

I was definitely sagging during the run intervals around mile 6-7. I told Vera and we slowed our pace. At least that’s what I thought until I saw the splits for the race which show we got faster. Whatever! It felt slower, and that’s what counts. Until almost mile 10 it’s pretty boring, but the “fans” and bands and cheerleaders out were great. When we rounded to turn for Angels Stadium, I had goosebumps. The lead in to the stadium is lined with Boy and Girl Scouts. They are so fantastic! Lots of high-fives and smiles.

Then it was stadium time.

We ran the edges of the field and saw ourselves on the Jumbotron and back out until we hit…

And then we just kept running. Vera (our fearless running group leader) offered to run Trish in at her fastest pace for the last mile, but Trish chose to stay with me (sweet) so we could finish together. The next three miles are uneventful. Within a mile of the finish, I say I’ll try to start skipping our walk breaks to run it in fastah. My favorite fan sign from that time? “I’m very proud of you too, total stranger.”

We had an oomph for the finish, passing people and running it in, Trish and I holding hands up high over the finish line. It was great! Then came the bling, baby!

We hung out for a while with our group, eating bagels and bananas, and then headed to Jamba Juice for some protein in a smoothie. Then we walked a mile and a half back to our hotel to shower. Good idea before an hour-long drive.

It was an amazing conclusion to what’s been an unforgettable few months training with Trish. If it weren’t for the fact she’s a skinny bitch more slender person and faster than me, we’d be running soul mates since we push each other in different ways, me pushing her to ditch her left brain a bit and her pushing me to ditch my music and tune in to the people and sights around me.

Everyone needs some Goofy in their lives!


*edited to add this is not a recap of the official Goofy Walt Disney World race (which is a half marathon Saturday and a full marathon on Sunday), but I do have that on the calendar for 2013.

Somebody Get This Freakin’ Clown off my Back!

Today is a fabulous day because I got my hair done. Cut, colored, no visible greys, and the best scalp and neck massage. I almost moaned out loud, but I stopped myself. This is what a hot mama looks like sitting on her couch avoiding housework working on her blog.

I probably should have put on some lipstick. Or get better at taking pictures.

On the way home from the salon I was hungry. It had been four hours since I’d eaten my pumpkin/Coach’s Oats pancakes with pumpkin Greek yogurt & chia seeds.

I really, really wanted McDonald’s. I really, really wanted a greasy burger and those amazing fries and a big Coke Zero. And it’s funny that I wasn’t making excuses justifying getting them. I simply wanted them, so I could get them. This is SO working opposite my goals. This is SO not the choice I want to make. I just WANT it, like a spoiled baby.

I was so frustrated by my desire that I got tears in my eyes sitting in the car.

I examined what else I could do. I thought about blogging that I got McDonald’s and feeling like a failure for EVERYONE to see. I decided I’d make myself a burger for lunch. I drove to Trader Joe’s and looked for lean beef or turkey or even a veggie burger. They didn’t have the Boca grilled burgers (which Hungry Girl says are best). They did however have these American Style Kobe burgers:

Apparently American Style means you want to have a big, fat ass large portion and the number of calories in a milkshake.

In case you need glasses your monitor’s dirty, that’s 660 calories and 56 grams of fat. Um, no thanks. I’d rather actually get the milkshake. I got these instead.

These were half as big and 150 calories. I wanted to make my burger yummy, so I picked up some blue cheese that I could put on with A1 sauce. Yum.

I have been stalking the girl on reading RunEatRepeat http://runeatrepeat.com/, and she’s had green bean fries a couple of times. That sounded like something I could go along with, so I picked up some green beans too. I hustled home and started cooking. I found a green bean recipe on AllRecipes that was yummy http://allrecipes.com/recipe/dads-pan-fried-green-beans/detail.aspx

These were special because they were washed and cleaned. Apparently somebody wants all the bases covered. Here is my yummy, homemade not greasy, filled with oil or artificial stuff lunch. It took a million times little longer than driving through McDonald’s. I have even more dirty dishes to do now. But I’m happy to have gone through the struggle and discomfort of not giving in to what I want just because I want it, and maybe I’ve gotten just a little bit of the weight of Ronald McDonald off my back.

What’s weighing you down?

What the flax?

Yesterday was a busy day: little trip to Trader Joe’s, coffee with a friend, 2 depositions that ran from 11:00 to 5:00, a mammogram, and dinner and a movie with friends. No wonder I woke up tired! I did, however, do a nice, slow 1/2 hour run since I’m in my taper week before the Disneyland half this weekend.

At TJ’s I could only buy things that weren’t refrigerated so I picked up some granola, Kashi, and these:

I need snacks I can carry with me that have protein and fuel my lust for peanut butter.  I showed the top bar to one of the attys in depo, and he thought I was giving it to him. Nooooooooo!!!!!!!! But I just sat and figured it’s worth $1.30 and another trip to TJ’s to engender good will and gain another possible client.

I also picked up toasted flax seeds.

Sorry that I look like a dufus, but the program wouldn’t rotate the pic. I’ve never had flax seeds before, but I branched out with chia seeds last week (pretty much no taste and a little crunch was my verdict.)

I added them to my Coach’s Oats this morning, along with blueberries and Greek yogurt. Yes, I feel I am the queen of antioxidants today.

I could definitely taste these. I used 1 tbsp. because it’s 90 (!) calories for the 2-tbsp serving. Overall I didn’t care for the toasted taste in my oats, but I would definitely use them on a salad or on veggies.

I’m frustrated with my increasing size and was thinking next week, after the half, I’ll start focusing on food since I don’t necessarily want to calorie-restrict right now. Then it occured to me that’s a big, fat excuse, and I decided to start today, using my handy-dandy journal since I find the app on my phone too much a pain in the ass cumbersome.

That’s one page, people. I figure you get the point.

And I picked up just another little thing at TJ’s.

Wouldn’t you have?

Blogging Requires Makeup

But more on that later. The past couple of days my body has been recovering from Sunday’s race. I’m feeling good, but my eating has gotten “sloppy.” I’ve had healthy, yummy stuff like these Coach’s Oats pancakes I made and topped with Greek yogurt and strawberries.

I apparently licked the lens of my camera before taking the picture, though I must have been so hungry I blacked out and don’t remember it.

Today it’s back on track eating healthfully most of the time. I have two depos, the first one starting at 11:00, which gives me time for coffee with my friend before work. When I work, I pack a lot of small snacks and eat throughout the day because I never know if these attorneys will give me a lunch break my schedule is so variable, so I don’t end up with “meals” per se.

This weekend we did a little costume-related shopping. Hubby and brother and I are doing the Gladiator Rock’n’Run in Pasadena on 10/1 and are planning on dressing up. Well, my brother and I are and Alan’s going along with us. It’s a 10K with obstacles like low crawling in the mud, an eight-foot wall, and running the Rose Bowl steps to name a few.

Here I am looking for inspiration:

I could gore my competitors with the horns!

And I’m all for getting a shirt that says “I run for tequila.”

Hi-larious! This is the one my brother likes. The boys would wear this with those t-shirts that show muscles

And I could improv a white dress and headress.

This is where makeup comes in. Geesh. I look like a happy corpse! Maybe I should put my face on before I leave the house at least some lipstick was in order.

What’s your costume idea?